What her future holds...

I’ve been thinking about what I would tell this little girl about her life if I had the chance. I smile to think of the fun days ahead in high school--amazing friends, playing sports, and dating. Then moving onto college, waiting for a missionary, and living the dream of being married in the temple and starting her family. She will have children all of whom will be the greatest gifts and blessings in her life. Motherhood will be her greatest joy.

Then I think of the pain that lies in her path. She will be hurt in ways that her innocence could have never imagined possible. All she ever hoped for will be ripped from her hands—more than once. Behind the scenes in her life, and the happy face she keeps for her children, she will cry and be broken. Darkness will threaten to overthrow her spirit. But she will move forward, moment by moment, because that is all she can do and her children will depend on her to do it.

That little girl has no clue what is to come, but as I have thought about it, I’m so grateful for that. She will grow to understand that even when she doesn't have much to give, it will always be enough. She will be blessed with strength beyond her own. Her faith will be tested, but she will get to experience miracles so personal and perfect that she will know with the deepest surety that she has infinite worth. Her deepest sorrows will lead to her greatest rejoicing. She will get to discover all the beautiful moments that make up a meaningful life. I’ve realized I wouldn’t want to tell her what is to come because it would rob her of the learning and understanding that allows for such discoveries and treasures of truth.  

There is so much wisdom in Heavenly Father’s plan. Sometimes our greatest Goliath can be the Unknown, but how beautiful the “not knowing” is in that it gives us the opportunity to grow during difficult times and cherish more deeply all the goodness we experience. The Unknown surfaces our hope which leads us to as much beauty, adventure, peace, and joy that we are willing to seek and live worthy of. So if it came to it, all I would tell that little girl is simply (and magnificently!) that she is loved and known by her Creator. Because of that love, her future has every possibility of all the happiness and joy that life could ever offer. And that’s the reality for everyone—Heavenly Father loves and is aware of each and every one of us. His plan for each of us truly is a plan of HAPPINESS!

Rerouting...

On a road-trip with my dad, we enthusiastically took off to go pick up my new van. Our destination:  Bullhead City, Arizona.  We had a rough idea of where we thought it was--somewhere up by Lake Powell so we headed north on the I-15 from our home in St. George. As soon as we were on our way, I decided to turn on our GPS to verify more specifically where our destination was located. My dad and I were both surprised to discover that Bullhead City was the opposite way we were headed. We needed to be headed south on the 15 and go through Las Vegas. Our GPS got us going the right way and we were both glad we checked before we had gone too far in the wrong direction. 

We finally made it to Bullhead City. While we were waiting at a light we plugged in the exact address we were traveling to. The light turned green as it came up, but it was too late to make the correct righthand turn. Our GPS rerouted us. We were able to take another route that consisted of a slight detour, but we did make it safely to our intended destination.

Life can be a lot like my drive to Bullhead City. Sometimes we take a wrong turn and sometimes life sends us on other detours we did not anticipate. However, in Heavenly Father's most perfect plan, He provided the Atonement of Jesus Christ which can be our GPS. A perfect navigation system without flaw. Because of His sacrifice, we can always be rerouted to arrive where we are meant to go for our greatest happiness and to become who we are meant to be to find the greatest peace as we fulfill our eternal purposes. He knows our exact location and He knows every single possible route to get us to our destination. We are never too far lost. We are never so far off track that He doesn't know our location or how to bring us back on course.

I am grateful everyday that the Atonement has led me and brought me back on course after traveling through the roughest terrains when life has taken unexpected detours. Sometimes it has been step-by-step guidance, but it has always given me perfectly exact direction in getting me on course to the life I desire and am meant to live. 

Happy For Those Who Are Happy

A few weeks ago when I was picking my youngest girls up from school, my six-year-old jumped in the car full of enthusiasm. With the biggest smile on her face, Kate joyfully exclaimed, "Mom, I just feel so happy for Kambrie." Curious and surprised, I asked Kate why she was so happy for her friend. She went on to explain that the next day was Kambrie's birthday. The following day would be their class's hard-earned "stuffed animal" party. Then finally, it would be Halloween when they'd get to have their Costume Parade! Kate told me, "She will have three good days in a row--the rest of the week--and I just feel so happy for her!"

My heart was touched by her genuine happiness for her friend. It wasn't Kate's birthday or about the fun she would have that caused her excitement. It was purely for another person's happiness. Hiding the tears that welled up in my eyes, I pulled on the the street toward home with a heart full of love and gratitude for the big lesson my little girl taught me about selflessly caring for others. 

A few days later, as I was--you guessed it!---in the car, driving my kids to all the places they needed to be, that sweet experience came to mind quickly followed by the words "mourn with those that mourn, comfort those that stand in need of comfort." At first, I wasn't sure why that scripture came to mind in conjunction with my thoughts about my experience with Kate, but almost instantly, I recognized the message.

Through the ups and downs of life, I think we generally are able to mourn with those that mourn. Naturally, I think most of us seek to comfort, lift, and help those who are facing difficult situations. Then it hit me! It isn't always as easy to be happy for those who are happy. For the spouse whose marriage is falling apart, it can be painful noticing someone else enjoy the loving marriage they would do anything to have. For the couple who longs to start their family, but deals with infertility, it can be heartbreaking when their friends keep growing their families sometimes even without trying. To someone who sits in a wheelchair or suffers with health issues, it can be incredibly difficult to watch others take for granted the abilities that allow them to live their lives so freely. During different trials, some blessings that we so desire for ourselves can be painful to see another enjoy. Being happy for others especially when they receive the blessings we righteously and patiently seek, is a great indicator of, not only where we are emotionally, but spiritually as well. 

Being happy for those who enjoy the blessings you have lived worthy of, but have not been blessed with, shows incredible faith in knowing that those blessings will one day be yours even if it means waiting until the next life. Being happy for those who are happy, shows significant humility in recognizing that although you have not been blessed in the ways that someone else has, you have a different calling and have been blessed in your own personal, sacred ways. Being happy for those who are happy, requires charity and love at its highest degree. Reaching past the pain of your own broken heart to feel happiness for someone else's joy is a love that cannot be matched.

May we seek to mourn and comfort those that stand in need of comfort, but may we also strive to to be the kind of person who can be happy for those that are happy despite where we are along our own journey. I'm grateful that the Atonement provides healing for the injustices of life which can allow each of us to be happy and content for the life that we individually have been given as well as being truly happy for the different blessings we see other's enjoy.   

Making a Bigger Impact Than Cornoavirus

Normally my Saturday would have started by sitting on the sidelines of my son's soccer game. I would have then coached my daughter's game and chased around doing things that need to be done before a new week starts. I would have spent my day tomorrow in worship services. Monday, I would have started our weekly routine of work, school, games, and other activities all over again. 

Instead, I am sitting here on my couch writing. All the games have been cancelled. Worship services for tomorrow have been cancelled. Come Monday, I will not be returning to work at least for a few weeks. I am worrying about when toilet paper will become available again because we are down to a few last rolls. I finally turned my phone off. The constant bombardment of messages, emails, news stories, and people in panic has me exhausted.

How did something that started across the world come to affect my life so greatly? And not just my life, but it has literally affected the entire world--a virus that started in one small place. To that I don't have all of the answers, but there is one truth highlighted that I do know for sure. The impact of just one place, one person, one choice is more far-reaching than we can ever imagine.   

The Coronavirus has closed schools, businesses, leagues, and corporations. The economic impact will surely be devastating to many businesses which ripples further down to the families who need the work and income to provide for their families. Children who rely on the school for their meals may struggle through the coming weeks. Athletes are losing future opportunities because of their seasons being canceled. The consequences are too numerous to list and there are many unknowns about how this will continue to influence our families and communities. But my question is, "what am I going to do about it?" 

Am I going to sit around being upset about all the important events being cancelled or am I going to take the opportunity to reflect and ensure that my life is aligned with God's will, spend quality time with my children, and strengthen my home?

Am I going to let panic take over and push and shove through the crowds to get to the last roll of toilet paper on the shelf or am I going to see what items I can spare that someone else may stand in need of?

Am I going to be an example of what fear looks like or what faith looks like?

Finally, am I going to add to the stress and chaos or am I going to stand and make a difference for good?

During this tumultuous time, we have all been given a unique opportunity to lift where we stand and make an impact for good. We can use this time to strengthen our families, lift our friends, and build more unified communities by serving and reaching out in love. I dare say the rippling effects of choosing to react in that manner can spread just as far and wide as the Coronavirus itself! In a time when a single virus is affecting the entire world, we have the power to make just as big of an impact for good! 

Empty Easter Eggs

I opened my eyes this morning to a bunch of little faces right next to mine, eager for an Easter egg hunt to begin! I watched as my children ran from room to room. Our house rang with random shouts of, "I found one!" After each egg, they couldn't help but to see the treasure left inside before rushing off to search for the next egg. At the end of the hunt, they gathered up all the eggs that the Easter bunny had given them and emptied the contents with much excitement. Empty eggs piled up on the table and were left behind as they went to enjoy all they had received. 

Seeing the pile, I couldn't help but reflect on what Easter means to me. I am on my own sort of journey in finding all that Heavenly Father has in store for me. As I "search" the scriptures and words of the prophet, I am blessed. As I "seek" to do the Lord's will, I receive tender mercies and experience miracles in ways that carry me and motivate me to keep going. In life however, when the journey ends, it is because of something "empty" that it really only begins. There was something left empty long ago, and that is where the greatest gift is found. 

Three days after the crucifixion of Jesus Christ, He rose and there was left an "empty" tomb. If we continue on our journey and keep the commandments, the significance of the empty tomb makes it possible for us to receive eternal life "which gift is the greatest of all the gifts of God." (Doctrine and Covenants 14:7) Because of an empty tomb, death is not the end. Because of an empty tomb, I will get to be with my family forever. And because of an empty tomb, I will get to know "the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom [He] sent." (John 17:13) There could be nothing greater and nothing I desire more!

Jesus Christ truly suffered and died for me and for all of us. He has carried my sorrows, He has made it possible for me to have hope. Without Him, I fall so very short. I know that He lives! I know that He knows me and He knows each of us. I am so grateful for all of the blessings that he continues to pour upon my family. Most of all, I am grateful for an "empty" tomb and what that means for me, my family, and each one of us as children of a loving Heavenly Father.   

A Perfectly Imperfect Life

Have you ever been scrolling through your social media feed and just thought, "does everyone have a perfect life except me?" Sometimes (especially with social media) we fool ourselves into believing other people have it all going for them. In reality, everyone has their struggles.

On the outside, everything in my life seemed just peachy for a long time. On my anniversary four years ago, I made the following tribute to my spouse on my Facebook page:

"Although my anniversary was yesterday, I couldn't let the chance pass me by to say I LOVE YOU to the man who was my first kiss, covered my yard with snow my first Christmas in the desert, was the pilot my first time on an airplane, is the father of our three beautiful children, works harder than any other person I know, moved to St. George mostly because he knew that is where I wanted to live, and has given me some of the best moments of my life. Forever and always Babe!"

It sounds just like a fairy-tale doesn't it? This was evidence to the world of a picture-perfect relationship. However, truth was that those words were from a woman who was trying to reach across galaxies to revive any life left in her relationship. My marriage was falling apart. I fought hard against the reality that I couldn't keep everything all together how I wanted. I finally had to let go of my perfect plan (my pride) and trust God with my life.

My marriage still ended in divorce. Looking back though, I can see how God had a plan much greater than I had for myself. He took all the ugly parts of life and of me and somehow brought them together in a way that made me better. He made me stronger. He taught me about forgiveness, compassion, empathy, and showed me who I am. I faced situations I would have never understood had I not lived through them. My family is much stronger because of the nightmare we lived through.

This is not the story I would have written for myself, but it is somehow okay. The journey has been filled and is still filled with so many unexpected bumps, but because of a loving Creator, all those imperfections have worked together so perfectly for the good of my family.

So even if life seems so perfect on the outside for everyone else, let's be aware that battles are often fought privately and silently. Let's reach out and love everyone no matter how ok (or not ok) they seem. And let's stop believing we are the only one that is less than perfect. Stop comparing the worst parts of your life to the best in those around you. And most importantly, let's turn to our loving Father in Heaven who can take all the ugliness in our lives to create a perfectly imperfect life.

He lives! And He has given me a weekly reminder...

Every Sunday when I attend church I partake of the Sacrament. I partake of the bread that symbolizes Jesus Christ's body and drink the water that symbolizes His blood. I had always thought we are to remember His body that He sacrificed for us. I pictured His Atonement and what His body suffered and endured to make that possible. I believe that is part of it, but perhaps there is more.

Jesus Christ appeared to the people of Nephi after His resurrection. There He administered the sacrament. In 3 Nephi 18:7, Jesus teaches, "and this shall ye do in remembrance of my body, which I have shown unto you." In this account, it seems to me that the bread is to remind them of His resurrected body.

In a book written by Stephen Covey titled, "Spiritual Roots of Human Relations," he discusses how it is the Lord's work and glory to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man (Moses 1:39). "When the Lord revealed [this]...he essentially outlined the two great parts...of all that he has attempted to do among men since the beginning." The first part is immortality, and the second part is eternal life. Immortality is for everyone because of the miracle of the resurrection. Eternal life, "which has to do with the quality of the resurrection...is personal achievement by each individual made possible through the Atonement of the Lord Jesus Christ."

Could it be that the sacrament symbolizes exactly that? We remember His body and the gift we have of immortality. We rejoice in the miracle that Jesus Christ indeed lives! Not only that, we will have that same opportunity! Then after we partake and remember that marvelous gift, we partake of the water to remember the second part. We realize our need for the Atonement in order to achieve eternal life which is really only possible because of the first part.

I've gained personal insight on the meaning of the sacrament cup and the role of being able to follow the will of God no matter how bitter the "cup." Now, I add that it's really even a miracle in the first place that that matters. It matters that I choose His will because Jesus Christ actually lives! Otherwise there would be no point!

The sacrament, in addition to other important symbolisms, represents very well God's plan - to bring to pass the immortality AND eternal life of man.